How Local Are You?
We can’t all live at the beach, but we all have a connection. Whether you are local by address or local in spirit matters not. But for those who just have to keep score, here’s a gauge.
You do your grocery shopping on Wednesday mornings from Easter through the end of September. 3 points
Nicola v. Grotto: You have a clear favorite. Definitely: 2 points; Eat both: 1 point; Couldn’t care less: 0 points
In the 1980s you were a regular for Long Island Iced Tea Night at the Summer House, Locals Night or Critter Night at Libby’s (RIP), or Buffett Night at Tavern on the Green. Once or twice a summer: 1 point; Three to five times a summer: 2 points; Never missed a week: 5 points
You are a still a regular at The Starboard’s Bloody Mary bar or the Saturday Afternoon Jam Session at the Bottle & Cork. Once or twice a summer: 1 point; Three to five times a summer: 2 points; Every weekend, without fail: 5 points
You have partaken in Dewey’s group house life. 1 point
You partook in Dewey’s group house life, then bought a place of your own. 3 points
You have a secret spot for hand-lining blue crabs. 2 points
a sand shark in the surf. 0 points
a puffer in the surf. 1 point
a bluefish in the surf. 2 points
a rockfish in Canary Creek. 3 points
a white marlin in Baltimore Canyon. 4 points
Your cottage still doesn’t have heat. 3 points
You still lease in Rehoboth by the Sea. 5 points
You spend most weekends working on the house. 1 point
You recall when the Rhodes 5 & 10s in Fenwick and Bethany sold surfboards. 2 points
You still refuse to consider Milton, Millsboro, Dagsboro or Selbyville “the beach.” Things change. 0 points
You played Beach Blanket Bingo at Whiskey Beach back in the day. 5 points
You witnessed the birth of Love Seed Mama Jump at Sydney’s Side Street in 1991. 3 points
You are a regular at the Dairy Queen in Fenwick Island. Once or twice a summer: 1 point; Three to five times a summer: 2 points; Once a week: 3 points
You rarely go out to dinner until the September specials kick in—and you know them all. 2 points
You know the Rehoboth Foodie by name. 3 points
You’ve commented on rehobothfoodie.com. 1 point
You’ve ridden the boats at Funland. 2 points
Your children ride the boats at Funland. 2 points
Your grandchildren ride the boats at Funland. 3 points
Your beater has a surf fishing tag that you use to avoid parking headaches and get to uncrowded beaches. 3 points
You belong to Rehoboth Beach Sailing Association, Lewes Yacht Club or a similar organization. 3 points
You are a regular kiteboarder, kayaker or stand-up paddler. 2 points
You still haven’t given up your sailboard. 1 point
You obey speed limits and no-wake rules in the Inland Bays. 3 points
You never, ever speed through Bethany. 3 points
You’re still ticked about beach replenishment at Naval Jetty and Northside, though you get priority when surfing there. 3 points
You right upside down horseshoe crabs and stop traffic on the highway for sea turtle crossings. 2 points
You’ve helped save a stranded marine mammal. 5 points
You know a channeled whelk from a knobbed whelk. 1 point
You’ve snuck into a bunker at Cape Henlopen State Park. 2 points
You own an original work by Abraxus Hudson or Laura Hickman. 1 point
You own an original painting by Jack Lewis or Howard Schroeder. 3 points
You don’t go anyplace you can’t walk or bike to on Summer Saturdays. 3 points
On your first visit to the beach, you will pay an obscene parking fine. You are at heightened risk of head or neck injury in the surf.
You are still flapping about summertime glory days spent waiting tables and partying way, way too much.
You thought buying a summer place was a smart investment. As it turns out, you can’t rent it out as often as you’d expected. But that’s OK. You can ride your bike every weekend with the triathlon tribe on Coastal Highway, and you might not otherwise have discovered kiteboarding.
Congratulations. Your drivers license will get you a nice little discount here and there. You are eligible to run for town commissioner or city council—and, possibly, crazy enough to do so.