GROOMS TELL ALL:INSIDE THE MIND OF A MAN



Everyone knows that the wedding day is all about the bride. The groom? He’s just the guy in the tux. They don’t sing “Here comes the groom” at the beginning of weddings, do they?

That’s how the old stereotypes go, anyway. Not that there isn’t some truth hidden in the cliché. Many women grow up dreaming of their magical wedding day, when they’re swept into marital bliss by Mr. Right. And, of course, their hair is perfect and they’re wearing a killer Vera Wang gown. Most guys, on the other hand, grow up dreaming about the honeymoon and playing ball with their kids.

The truth about weddings lies somewhere between the typecast Bridezilla and the get-me-to-the-church-on-time groom. Women may well care more about the details, but men are hardly insensitive to the importance of the day. Many grooms, whether it’s commonly known or not, help in the planning. Don’t believe it? Here are three grooms who were involved, albeit in varying degrees of participation.

The Bit Player

First, there was the excitement. Next came the calm. Then the chaos started.

Because Jon Kirch proposed to Jamie Myers on December 23, 2003, to marry him there was an inevitable post-engagement lull. After all, the holidays take precedent over practically anything, so the opportunity to make wedding plans was limited by the year-end festivities. After New Year’s Day, however, it all started.

“As soon as that ended, we were booking [DJs] and doing everything,” says Kirch, a graduate student at the University of Delaware who also works for the Delaware General Assembly.

Well, maybe not “we.” Kirch admits he was “as active a participant as I was allowed to be. I tried not to get involved. I wasn’t allowed.”

He isn’t disappointed so much as amused. When he and Jamie married on January 7, 2006, he wasn’t much of a party planner. So he let the professionals—his fiancé and her mother—handle the heavy lifting. And that was just fine with him.

“She would tell me I had to go to a certain place at such-and-such a time, and I would say, ‘Okay, great,’” Kirch says. “I know that my sense of style is inferior to that of most women. Don’t ask me to do that kind of stuff. I’ll mess it up.” Kirch applied his hands-off approach even down the homestretch. Yes, there were details, and the stress was mounting. But he was cool, calm and collected. “I tried not to get involved too much,” he says.

As the wedding approached, Kirch began to worry a bit, not about the flowers or the music, but about the whole process. He admits to being “freaked out” a little, since he takes marriage “very seriously.” Once he got over his jitters, Kirch spent the day cleaning up and reflecting on the gravitas of the day.

He and Jamie married at 1 p.m. The reception and post-party lasted until 2 a.m. Kirch may not have been too involved in planning the day, but he absolutely enjoyed himself.

“It definitely exceeded my expectations,” he says. “It was an amazing day. I had a blast. Everybody got along so well. We had an awesome time, and everybody who came had fun, too.”

Down to the Minute

Mike Wilson works for the U.S. Army Research Laboratory in Aberdeen, Maryland, so he knows how to keep things in line and running efficiently. Even so, he and his wife, Sarah, had a few last-minute crises to prevent.

“I definitely looked at things from more of a practical viewpoint,” Wilson says. “My wife was no different than most brides. She wanted a fairy-tale wedding. My desire was to have everything come together.”

There was plenty of stress as the day approached. While their reception site, the Goodstay Center on the University of Delaware’s Wilmington campus, provided a wedding planner, there was still plenty to do. “It didn’t go smoothly at all,” Wilson says. “There was quite a bit to coordinate. It was quite a headache.”

One thing no one could anticipate, or coordinate, was the weather. The couple planned to wed outside amidst beautiful gardens, but poor weather could have forced them indoors—a situation no one wanted. The uncertainty kept the couple on edge for days. Fortunately, the fates complied, and the weather for their 5 p.m. ceremony was a mild—and dry—70 degrees. In the end, everything came together quite well. The couple enjoyed a serene day and a bounty of good friends and wishes.

“I think we both enjoyed our wedding very much,” Wilson says. “There were only a couple minor problems. I think we were very fortunate to have everything work out like it did. I’ve been to weddings where things go wrong, the bride panics and makes it worse.”

The Long Haul

Richard Normington still blames Melissa Rice for his bad grades in Spanish class at Dover High School—not that it’s her fault. Had he worked up the courage to ask her out sooner, he wouldn’t have spent countless hours mooning over her from afar and would have learned more Español.

Normington eventually got it together, and 12 years later, he and Melissa wed in Dover. Sounding like the moonstruck teenager who couldn’t keep his eyes off his classmate, Normington credits his wife for the wedding’s smooth operation. “Thank God for women,” he says, laughing.

The fact that Normington and Melissa dated for 11 years before he popped the question was a big factor in the wedding’s trouble-free status. “[A hassle-free wedding day] couldn’t have happened any other way,” Normington says. Not that he was an overactive participant in the planning process. He showed up when he was supposed to, gave opinions when (infrequently) asked, and followed orders when expected. “I definitely attempted to go to every session with the florist, etc.,” he says. “We tackled the wedding together.”

As the day approached, Normington was amazed at how seamlessly the details came together. Of course, he didn’t see Melissa’s feet churning below the surface.

One of the larger concerns was the bridal party, which checked in at a whopping 16 people, not counting the bride and groom. But even with such an unwieldy aggregation of friends and family, there was only one minor snafu. On the wedding day, one of Normington’s future brothers-in-law had to race back to his house to get the correct vest. Other than that, the day was trouble free.

“We enjoyed ourselves as much as possible on our wedding day,” he says. “I do see the day as magical. There was a lot of legwork done to get it together. The fact that we did it on our own, and it went smoothly, makes the 12 years prior to our marriage come together.”  

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January 2017

January 3 - 28  “Winter Group Show” Rotating Group Show features a variety of art in different styles and media. Custom Framing & Gift Certificates are always available. Gallery Hours:...

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Greenville, DE  19807
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Sports Card & Collectible Show at Aetna Fire Hall on Jan. 22—sign up now! -Sports Cards McFarlane Figures Comic Books Non-Sports cards Wrestling Items Vintage Starting...

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400 Ogletown Road
Newark, DE  19711
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The Rehoboth Beach Film Society announces the next play in the exciting series of National Theatre Live screenings. National Theatre Live is a groundbreaking project that presents the best of...

Cost: $18-$20

Where:
Cinema Art Theater
17701 Dartmouth Drive, #2
Lewes, DE  19958
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Sponsor: Rehoboth Beach Film Society
Telephone: 302-645-9095
Contact Name: Jeri Kaplan
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Belly Dance Classes with Zahra Beginner & intermediate classes open to teens and adults Sundays in January starting Jan 8th Beginner: 2:30-3:30 p.m. Intermediate: 1 - 2 p.m (must get...

Cost: $15-$42

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Take the Lead Studio
320 Lantana Drive
Hockessin , DE  19711
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The Resident Ensemble Players, Delaware’s professional acting company performing at the University of Delaware, presents The Bells by Theresa Rebeck. During the great Yukon gold rush of the...

Cost: $15 - $30

Where:
Thompson Theatre, Roselle Center for the Arts
110 Orchard Rd.
Newark, DE  19716
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Ah, typecasting—the baritone is always the bad guy! In Devils, Drunks & Dastardly Dudes, we’ll go on an operatic journey of men behaving badly. We’ll add a tenor to the mix, too… but we...

Cost: $29-$59

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OperaDelaware Studio
4 South Poplar St.
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Come give curling a try! At this 2-hour intro-to-curling event we'll provide a basic lesson then coach you through a mini-game.  Whether you just want to cross #curling off your bucket list or...

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The Pond Ice Arena
101 John Campbell Rd
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January 3 - 28  “Winter Group Show” Rotating Group Show features a variety of art in different styles and media. Custom Framing & Gift Certificates are always available. Gallery Hours:...

Cost: free

Where:
The Station Gallery
3922 Kennett Pike
Greenville, DE  19807
View map »


Telephone: 302-654-8638
Website »

More information

The Rehoboth Beach Film Society announces the next play in the exciting series of National Theatre Live screenings. National Theatre Live is a groundbreaking project that presents the best of...

Cost: $18-$20

Where:
Cinema Art Theater
17701 Dartmouth Drive, #2
Lewes, DE  19958
View map »


Sponsor: Rehoboth Beach Film Society
Telephone: 302-645-9095
Contact Name: Jeri Kaplan
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Notbybreadalone Ministries presents Feeding the Hungry Outreach. All are welcome to come and partake of food, fun and fellowship. Those who desire a better way of life through Jesus Christ are...

Cost: Free

Where:
2nd and 3rd Streets
Wilmington, DE  19801


Sponsor: Notbybreadalone Outreach Ministries
Telephone: 442-0440
Contact Name: Ministers Wayne and Stephanie Dumpson
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Guest speakers Patty Dailey-Lewis, executive director of the Beau Biden Foundation, and Delaware Family Court commissioner Loretta Young will discuss how participation in social media can too...

Cost: Free

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Wilmington University - Dover
Building A Auditorium
3282 N DuPont Highway
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January 3 - 28  “Winter Group Show” Rotating Group Show features a variety of art in different styles and media. Custom Framing & Gift Certificates are always available. Gallery Hours:...

Cost: free

Where:
The Station Gallery
3922 Kennett Pike
Greenville, DE  19807
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Telephone: 302-654-8638
Website »

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Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9:30AM-12:00PM Fall session: Thursday, Dec 1st thru Thursday, December 15th Winter session: Tuesday, January 17th thru Thursday, March 30th   Drop in on Nature is...

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The Annex
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East Coast Garden Center Indoor Farmers Market Nov 8, 2016 - April 11, 2017  11 am- 2 pm 25 vendors Location:  East Coast Garden Center 30366 Cordrey Rd Millsboro, DE 19966 302-945-3489

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East Coast Garden Center Indoor Farmer's Marke 25 vendors

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East Coast Garden Center
30366 Cordrey Rd
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The Rehoboth Beach Film Society announces the next play in the exciting series of National Theatre Live screenings. National Theatre Live is a groundbreaking project that presents the best of...

Cost: $18-$20

Where:
Cinema Art Theater
17701 Dartmouth Drive, #2
Lewes, DE  19958
View map »


Sponsor: Rehoboth Beach Film Society
Telephone: 302-645-9095
Contact Name: Jeri Kaplan
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A four-week series of ballroom dancing classes taught by teachers from the BlueBallroom. Tuesdays starting Jan. 10. Classes are $30 a lesson for Non-Members. Non-Member slots are limited. For...

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805 N Broom St
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January 3 - 28  “Winter Group Show” Rotating Group Show features a variety of art in different styles and media. Custom Framing & Gift Certificates are always available. Gallery Hours:...

Cost: free

Where:
The Station Gallery
3922 Kennett Pike
Greenville, DE  19807
View map »


Telephone: 302-654-8638
Website »

More information

The Rehoboth Beach Film Society announces the next play in the exciting series of National Theatre Live screenings. National Theatre Live is a groundbreaking project that presents the best of...

Cost: $18-$20

Where:
Cinema Art Theater
17701 Dartmouth Drive, #2
Lewes, DE  19958
View map »


Sponsor: Rehoboth Beach Film Society
Telephone: 302-645-9095
Contact Name: Jeri Kaplan
Website »

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January 3 - 28  “Winter Group Show” Rotating Group Show features a variety of art in different styles and media. Custom Framing & Gift Certificates are always available. Gallery Hours:...

Cost: free

Where:
The Station Gallery
3922 Kennett Pike
Greenville, DE  19807
View map »


Telephone: 302-654-8638
Website »

More information

Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9:30AM-12:00PM Fall session: Thursday, Dec 1st thru Thursday, December 15th Winter session: Tuesday, January 17th thru Thursday, March 30th   Drop in on Nature is...

Cost: see description

Where:
The Annex
501 Chandler Mill Rd
Kennett Square, PA  19348
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Sponsor: The Land Conservancy
Telephone: 610-347-0347 ext.104
Website »

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Thursdays from 4:00PM-5:30PM Fall session: December 1st, 8th and 15th Winter session: Starts January 19th, every other Thursday until March 30th This program is based entirely outdoors and is...

Cost: Cost: $30 for TLC members / $40 for non-members

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MARC BROUSSARD In 2004, Marc Broussard, then a precocious 22-year-old singer/songwriter, released his major-label debut; he called it Carencro, after the Louisiana town where he was born and...

Cost: $22 SRO- $32 SEATED

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World Cafe Live Wilmington
500 N Market St
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The Resident Ensemble Players, Delaware’s professional acting company performing at the University of Delaware, presents The Bells by Theresa Rebeck. During the great Yukon gold rush of the...

Cost: $15 - $30

Where:
Thompson Theatre, Roselle Center for the Arts
110 Orchard Rd.
Newark, DE  19716
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Sponsor: Resident Ensemble Players
Telephone: (302) 831-2204
Website »

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January 3 - 28  “Winter Group Show” Rotating Group Show features a variety of art in different styles and media. Custom Framing & Gift Certificates are always available. Gallery Hours:...

Cost: free

Where:
The Station Gallery
3922 Kennett Pike
Greenville, DE  19807
View map »


Telephone: 302-654-8638
Website »

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Tutto Fresco has live entertainment every Friday night from 6:30–9:30 p.m. Call for details. http://tuttofrescode.com/

Where:
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514 Philadelphia Pike
Wilmington, DE  19809
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The Resident Ensemble Players, Delaware’s professional acting company performing at the University of Delaware, presents The Bells by Theresa Rebeck. During the great Yukon gold rush of the...

Cost: $15 - $30

Where:
Thompson Theatre, Roselle Center for the Arts
110 Orchard Rd.
Newark, DE  19716
View map »


Sponsor: Resident Ensemble Players
Telephone: (302) 831-2204
Website »

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Meeting every Friday, Bayhealth Kent General Hospital, 640 s. State Street, Dover, 7:30 pm., Private Dining Room #3 in the basement. For those who have, or think they may have a gambling problem....

Cost: 0.00

Where:
Bayhealth Kent General Hospital
640 S. State Street
Private Dining Room #3
Dover, DE  19901
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Telephone: 800-855-2CALLGA
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Cost: $12-$20

Where:
Wilmington Drama League
10 West Lea Blvd.
Wilmington, DE  19802
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Sponsor: Wilmington Drama League
Telephone: 302-764-3396
Contact Name: Kathy Buterbaugh
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January 3 - 28  “Winter Group Show” Rotating Group Show features a variety of art in different styles and media. Custom Framing & Gift Certificates are always available. Gallery Hours:...

Cost: free

Where:
The Station Gallery
3922 Kennett Pike
Greenville, DE  19807
View map »


Telephone: 302-654-8638
Website »

More information

January 28 – Saturday – 1 to 4 p.m. Science Saturday – Truss Me, You Won’t Fall! Become an engineer for the day. Design a bridge to hold as much weight as possible....

Cost: Activities are included in regular admission and free for members.

Where:
Hagley Museum
201 Hagley Creek Road
Wilmington, DE  19807
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Sponsor: Hagley Museum
Telephone: (302) 65802400 x 238
Contact Name: Jessica Eisenbrey
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The Resident Ensemble Players, Delaware’s professional acting company performing at the University of Delaware, presents The Bells by Theresa Rebeck. During the great Yukon gold rush of the...

Cost: $15 - $30

Where:
Thompson Theatre, Roselle Center for the Arts
110 Orchard Rd.
Newark, DE  19716
View map »


Sponsor: Resident Ensemble Players
Telephone: (302) 831-2204
Website »

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GRILLED CHEESE AND CRAFT BEER TASTING We have taken two of the best things on earth and paired them together – Grilled Cheese and Craft Beer – and paired them together in unexpected and...

Cost: $40

Where:
World Cafe Live Wilmington
500 N Market St
Wilmington, DE  19801
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Saturday, January 28, 2017 at  7:30 pm at St. David’s Episcopal Church, 763 Valley Forge Rd, Wayne, PA 19087 Sunday, January 29, 2017 at 3 pm at Church of the Holy Trinity, Rittenhouse Square...

Cost: Tickets are $25 online, and $30 at the door. Student tickets $10 at the door.

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Church of the Holy Trinity
1904 Walnut St.
Philadelphia, PA  19103
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Sponsor: Lyric Fest
Telephone: 215-438-1702
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Fan favorite, Dick Smith, returns to the Dickinson Theatre Organ Society concert stage on Saturday, Jan. 28, 2017 for a show that is sure to bring the house down! Dick Smith has been a...

Cost: $15 Adults; $10 Students

Where:
John Dickinson High School Auditorium
1801 Milltown Road
Wilmington, DE  19808
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Sponsor: Dickinson Theatre Organ Society
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The Dickinson Theatre Organ Society presents Dick Smith. For tickets, click here: http://www.dtoskimball.org/events-tickets/ticket-information/ For further information, please call us at...

Where:
, DE

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The Resident Ensemble Players, Delaware’s professional acting company performing at the University of Delaware, presents The Bells by Theresa Rebeck. During the great Yukon gold rush of the...

Cost: $15 - $30

Where:
Thompson Theatre, Roselle Center for the Arts
110 Orchard Rd.
Newark, DE  19716
View map »


Sponsor: Resident Ensemble Players
Telephone: (302) 831-2204
Website »

More information

Cost: $12-$20

Where:
Wilmington Drama League
10 West Lea Blvd.
Wilmington, DE  19802
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Sponsor: Wilmington Drama League
Telephone: 302-764-3396
Contact Name: Kathy Buterbaugh
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MOTHERSHIP Mothership is the area's premier Led Zeppelin Tribute show. Composed of seasoned, professional musicians Mario Padovani - vocals, keyboards, Frank Ginocchio - drums, Chris Julian -...

Cost: 15

Where:
World Cafe Live Wilmington
500 N Market St
Wilmington, DE  19801
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Telephone: 215-222-1400
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